We would need to take two city busses to get to the ferry, then at Nanaimo, another bus to Duncan, where our 10km walk would begin. It was mostly road-walking, and fairly flat.
I woke up at 6am, feeling anxious and nauseous. My anxiety was in overdrive because I had not prepared this trip as thoroughly as my recent Camino in Spain. I tried calming myself down, and suddenly started yawning with energy shifts. Yep, Nihan was up early too, doing clearings. Lol.
We met near the bus stop and took two Translink city busses to get to the Horseshoe Bay ferry terminal. It took nearly an hour and a half. Since we both get motion sickness on long bus rides, we each selected our favorite positions: me sideways, her facing forward. Yet, we were able to sit within easy talking distance of each other. Despite this, we both put on our BOSE noise cancellation headphones for the trip. Nihan was pleased that we could sit "next" to each other, while maintaining our seat preferences. "Everyone gets what they want!" She exclaimed happily.
At the Horseshoe Bay Ferry Terminal, we had time to get teas at Blends and wander to the water. We witnessed a totem pole bring returned to the earth, which is the First Nations tradition for poles at the end of their use. This pole told the history of the Tsimshian Nation.
This day was the first time I had seen her since she moved out from her married home and into her own place. She looked so relaxed, as if she had smoked a big doobie (an activity I knew she didn't partake in). Her shoulders were down, her face was placid, her hand gestures fluid and assured. She looked so at ease in her body, and the way she sat and moved was as if she had finally claimed her rightful space in the world. She suddenly looked like a "woman," instead of a little girl.
She spoke of the difficulties she'd been experiencing in her marriage, and how different it was living in a new place. At a few points there was anger and grief, but she still held this new embodiment TR throughout.
She was pleased I could see the shift in her, and I replied how I couldn't NOT see it! I kept marveling at it, and waiting for her to shift out of it, but she never did, even when talking about difficult topics and shedding a few tears!! She told me how her Conscious Dance community had noticed the change in her. When she arrived to dance that week, they had asked her, "What did you DO since we saw you last week?!"
She said the shift came automatically and naturally, after she moved into her new apartment. The key insight that shifted everything for her, and allowed her to move forward: "My mom does not own me. No man owns me." Before that, she had also done about a month's worth of work on the intention, "I am safe in my body." She talked about her recent experience of falling in love with herself, and truly giving herself the care and attention she required, for the first time in her life.
"It's like, nothing is outside of myself. Everything is inside. Even when something happens, and I start to get ipset, I look at it and say, 'Hmm... what's going on there?' and know it's totally safe for me to feel that. I give it what it needs."
It made me think of "wearing" your home around you while going about your day. She laughed and agreed.
I cried, so touched at her shifts, and so inspired by how swift and large they were, after she finally admitted the situation she had at home was truly not working, and moved out. It gave me hope that I too could embody that kind of relaxed ease, after I finally made the big changes I needed to make. In that moment, I also knew my teaching days were really over.
We cried together, in gratitude, each feeling like we had received a gift from the other. Me, to witness the reality of her shift; her, that I could validate it for her, especially considering that our relationship had originally begun with her as my Reiki student. I chuckled to myself at how "the student" had now become the "master," and could now lead me forward into this new way of being.
I was also shocked that my intention integrated so quickly! We had not even begun our walk yet!! We sat with our feet up on the windowsill, sharing our stories and watching the water and mountains.
Exiting the ferry in Nanaimo, Nihan exclaimed, "It looks like a small town in Turkey! Except for the type of trees."
We easily located the Island Link bus, right outside the ferry terminal. The big lettering on the side of the bus helped. ;) We had made a reservation for the southbound bus to Duncan. It was a smaller bus than we expected (14 seats, 12 of which were occupied), but it was really nice inside, with comfy seats. At least one seat had a 12 Volt outlet in it (I couldn't see every row to know if there were more). The northbound "bus" was parked ahead of it, but it was really just a van with many seats.
One neat thing about the ride to Duncan was how everyone was silent the whole trip! It was a nice contrast to the ferry. Nihan and I still both wore our BOSE noise cancellation headphones to cut the engine noise. As we sped down the highway, we watched the many raptors soaring above us: an eagle, a raven, and several turkey vultures. I wondered whether turkey vultures got their name because they looked like turkeys (their faces actually do), or whether they actually preyed on turkeys. The former seemed more likely; the latter more badass.
Nihan suddenly got a text message regarding doing a "dance journey" that night at our airbnb. The host led them. I had forgotten that we had enquired about it. We quickly agreed.
The bus stopped at a Chemainus gas station to drop off a passenger, and we saw Buddha statue. Nihan said, "It's a sign!" I asked, "Of what?" She answered, "Anything we want!" I laughed.
Just when I started to feel car sick, I looked out the window and saw "Duncan" on building signs. Minutes later, we were at the stop. We got out in front of the Museum, and walked a block to Craig St Brewpub.
We sat up on the rooftop patio and had the most amazing shrimp wraps. As John Denver's "Take me home, country roads" played in the background, we continued our conversation from the ferry. I was really wanting to integrate the insights I had started to have on the ferry, about her new state of being.
Nihan wanted to hear about an experience I had recently while doing Reiki. I had had it before, but this time was exciting because I was assisting Colin with his intention. I only seemed to have it when someone was really "going for it" in a really good transformative intention. I described it to her. It was like standing inside an LP record, buy the record was perhaps 2-3 times thicker than normal. The inside was empty, but yet felt rich with energy. The parts where the music is normally encoded were like the cosmos slowly revolving above and below me. All the information of the cosmos was there, and we could access it-- were permeated by it. Like being in a fertile void.
It had a very distinctive feel to me, a soft "heaviness" on the skin, like being draped in a comforter. It feels almost "sleepy," yet it was easy to think clearly. My body felt very cohesive, like I was only made of one single substance. All doubt disappeared, and I felt calm and capable of handling anything that could come up. The only other time I had that type of calm confidence was while walking.
Nihan got very excited. "Yes! Yes! That's what I am feeling! That's the feeling!!" She mentioned also feeling "big" and like time slowed down. That sounded like being "in the zone," which I had only ever experienced while playing squash. I wondered whether the feeling of being in "the zone" and "the fertile void" were actually the same. Perhaps I only thought they were different because I experienced them in very different settings/activities, or had not fully experienced the complete state yet?
Then I started laughing. "The fertile void? You know that's what Daoists call the Dao." Nihan clued in and started laughing too. I had been studying the Daoist philosopher Zhuangzi for the past 10 years, and during the last six months my PhD, I had been analyzing it intently for 16 hours per day... yet it was only on that moment I only clicked that Zhuangzi's "skillfulness" ("being in the zone") and "being one with the Dao" were most likely the exact same experienced reality. I mean, intellectually I knew it, but didn't connect MY experience of being "in the zone" playing squash with my "fertile void" experiences during Reiki with the possibility of living in Daoist wuwei as a permanent state in life.
It twigged to me that I could use a technique I had used in the past (for other purposes) to make that feeling a more ongoing daily state, available to me outside of the Reiki room. I got really excited then, and tried it right there at the table. It worked!
We ended up spending an hour and a half there -- much longer than I expected. When we got up to leave, I realized that being in that state, I had not noticed the loud noise of the fan that had been bothering me when we first sat down. That got me really excited. I would definitely practice this on our walk.
After lunch, we did the Totem Tour in downtown Duncan. I had not thought to schedule time for exploring Duncan, although I did know it was a cute town filled with First Nations art. I mentioned that I had spent the first three years of my life in Duncan. "This trip will be an extra important integration for you then," Nihan pronounced sagely.
Some of the totems were really striking visually.
Others were striking because they told a touching story, such as when a First Nations youth was exiled from his tribe and wandered to his death.
Of course I liked the totem of Raven Stealing the Sun, as my nickname is Raven, which is why Colin boasts a tattoo with this theme.
There was also an alley lined with photos and descriptions of the early Chinese Canadian history of the town. Chinese workers had come to the Cowichan Valley ca. 1880, and by ca. 1900, Duncan's Chinatown attracted Chinese Canadians from the entire region. In 1969, Duncan's Chinatown was demolished, to get a provincial grant to build many new buildings, including the distinctive Provincial building.
Walking out of Duncan along Allenby Rd, we passed the Cowichan Tribes office, which looked like traditional long houses. Walking on that stretch was not fun, because there was no sidewalk, but still plenty of traffic. Blackberry bushes stretched the length of the road until the bridge. Wherever space permitted, we indulged in a blackberry treat.
Nihan was surprised and confused at the amount of "garbage" strewn about many properties along Indian Road. "We're cutting through the Cowichan Indian Reserve," I replied. She had never seen this phenomenon before. It led to a wide-ranging discussion about middens and the effects of residential schools.
We stopped at Glenora Store to buy supper supplies. They offered a large selection of homemade soups to go, so we bought vegetable soup for dinner.
Just after Glenora Store, the only sounds were the birds and crickets. We passed vineyards and wild apple trees.
Turning off Glenora Rd onto Vaux Rd, Nihan was equally surprised by a set of extremely well-tended houses.
A little further along, we heard a loud rustling from the bushes beside the road. A deer and her fawn bounded about, then posed for our photos. I suddenly remembered the deer in the mural behind the Wild Woman totem in Duncan.
On Vaux Rd, we passed a farm with turkeys, chickens, a horse, and a curious goat. This short 10km trek was an extravaganza of animals!
We passed a couple of egg stalls, but they were sold out. We thought we might keep an eye out the next morning on our way past, although walking the next day's planned 20km with fresh eggs might prove a challenge. ;)
We walked more or less together, as our paces were pretty well-matched. When she and I walked together at home, pace never really crossed my mind: I just walked. Here on the trail, it seemed like her natural pace was actually a little faster than mine, so sometimes she pulled ahead a little. After my Camino experiences, I was amused that *she* was the "fast one," instead of me.
We both marvelled at how short the walk seemed. Even despite spending an unscheduled extra 90 mins in Duncan, we would still got to Akasha Meadows ahead of schedule. We toyed with the idea of doing some more walking after reaching Akasha Meadows. We knew they had a large property.
We arrived at Akasha Meadows just before 5pm and received a friendly welcome from a beautiful Husky dog. This airbnb was actually a trailer on a large acreage. Apparently, this dog's owners had lived in the trailer the previous year, before moving into a house across the street. The dog apparently still enjoyed his former home. A resident wild bunny hopped its way through the field by the trailer.
The inside of the trailer was quite nice, with hardwood floors and a full kitchen. Even a bathtub and shower! The toilet was a peat moss based composting toilet, and I was surprised that, as promised, it only smelled of fresh earth and nothing else.
The property had a yoga swing, a trampoline, a slack line, and aerial silks. Our host Ali demo'd the yoga swing for us. She was pretty impressive, pulling difficult poses without a single muscle tremor. Nihan was nearly overwhelmed with the options. She wanted to try everything!
But being at our day's destination perhaps signaled something to our bodies, and at the last minute, we decided on a nap before our Authentic Dance Journey. It was glorious! We both had a difficult time waking up afterwards.
We walked over to the main house where our host, Ali, had set up a sacred space for us. The dance journey was amazing!!
Ali began by explaining what the dance journey would be. She said we each carried a unique energy, that was our resonance in the world, and we would dance to discover and feel this frequency: our own "totem," just as animals acted as totems for First Nations peoples. Our jaws dropped. It was as if she had been listening to our recent conversations about finding out next step towards our authentic lives.
Next, the dance started with what I immediately recognized as a Daoist practice called "the bow between heaven and earth." Although Ali used different terms to describe it, the practice was identical. Now I was really interested!
Ali danced us through the five elements, both as individuals and as a group. I had done Gabrielle Roth's Five Rhythms dance before, so I had a few ideas of what to expect, but I did not expect what I got. The way my body moved was not usual for me. It was all subtle. Parts of my body led the rest of my body across the floor, like a lead and a follower.
During the "water" element, I suddenly heard a voice in my head saying, "Welcome to MY house, ladies! I've GOT this." I felt supremely confident and comfortable, and as if I were holding the container in which we were all dancing. After a while, I didn't want to keep holding the container, and realized I didn't have to: I had already established it, now I too could just dance in it, and it would hold me.
Next, I felt myself flapping my wings and floating on the wind, just when Ali said, "Welcome to the Air element." The song changed to "I will become Raven." :o
When she called us to dance our way across the floor as a group of sisters, I felt gossamer strings coming from each of us, weaving a pattern as we danced. There were several times during the dance that I was touched and let tears fall.
Afterwards, she wished us well on our "Cowichan pilgrimage"! Just then her two kids came screaming in... I heard Eminem's voice in my head "Whoops, there goes gravity!"
After the dance, we put on the delicious homemade veggie soup we had bought at Glenora Store, and got ready to make a campfire, but just then it started to rain. So we ended up eating our soup inside, having some quiet time (I blogged, she gave herself a foot massage), and calling it a night. Nihan commented how she didn't have to check her hangouts, since we were together, but how it didn't feel right when she didn't message. Colin had made a similar comment after I returned home from Spain. I joked how he could still message me from the other side of the room, like how Kristina and I sometimes did at the office.
While getting ready for bed, I noticed a small four leaf clover confetti on the floor in the washroom. I had seen this confetti at home --I must have brought it with me on my clothing! How it travelled with me for three busses, a ferry, 10km+ of walking, and a dance, I have no idea! "It's a sign!" I laughed.
I checked my email and saw an email from thoughtinspire.com titled "The Cosmic Dance"!!! It mentioned "The cosmic dance is consciousness in motion," and:
"The symphonic harmony of the cosmos is a dynamic ocean of vibrating strings, resting on a pure field of energy potential... The cosmic flow and dance is never ending... It is... shaping existence at the very fabric of the universe...."
The synchronicities just kept abounding that day! A sign we were on the right track, I decided.
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